Hello, my name is Tapdancer and I am a Facebook junkie.
I know - I was just in here, a few months back, touting my oh-so-virtuous offline time, and now I'm addicted again, and it's not even remotely intelligent, the time I spend. I could make the excuse that January is a month of hibernation, so where's the harm, etc, but um, what about the three months before now?
I'm telling myself that when I reach the 70th level of the Vampire Wars, and you either have to have 500 clan members or get eaten alive, that I'll quit then. And then I go and add 15 more total strangers to my friends list. Granted, I'm really careful of who I pick, but still - who am I and what has happened to the old Tapdancer?
Is there a twelve-step program for Facebook junkies, and if so, do I need neighbors or clan members to play, uh, join?
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Oh Girl, It's Been One Of THOSE Weeks!
Hi, it's me, your slack-assed blog-buddy.
So, Soap Opera Update: the big birthday party went off beautifully; the birthday girl had a fabulous time being fussed over and sung to by (possibly) the loudest gang of miscreants assembled. I did NOT go gently into that liquid state I was dreaming of; there was too much to do, and I wanted it all to go smoothly. So no drunk hostess, which is probably for the best - less calories to work off at the gym, right?
Monday night I attempted to upgrade my browser to Windows Explorer 8, which apparently is TOTALLY incompatible with my aging, almost 5 year-old computer (and doesn't that piss you off, that expensive shit like a computer is obsolete in less than 5 years? Can you see my middle finger raised aloft, Mr. Gates? What, is it hard to see for the forest of middle fingers?). After installing the IE8, my computer promptly did it's finest James Brown Breaking Down imitation: ("I can't do no more!") there was no internets to be had, and all her inner workings were Gorilla Glue gunked-up. Neat, huh? I dragged my moronic behunkus off to bed at 1 AM, only to rise at 7:30 to escort the herd to school (well, ok, part of the herd - one calf leaves at 7:00 now - the steer sees him off. Not sure how or why I'm calling my family cows - I could be a little punchy yet.), and get back to the business of trying to fix my mess.
After 3 fruitless hours on the phone with my internet provider, Hewlett Packard, and Microsoft (where the guy hung up on me), and three System Restores which didn't restore much, I knew it was time to wipe the slate clean (oh Christ, another metaphor!), and send the computer back in a time warp to it's beginning. Also known as System Recovery, and it means a lot of re-installing headaches, because after 5 years, where have all those Registration numbers and passwords, etc. gotten to? Luckily (in this case), I'm a bit of a packrat, albeit an organized one, and the whole caboodle was tucked in a bag that I'd stuck in the desk, so not too bad of a headache, but the bundled BS that came back up on the System Recovery made up for that!
Long story short, I spent all day yesterday getting the Portal of Internet Goodness back up and looking reasonably normal. It only took 12 hours of un-installing, re-installing, re-booting, etc. to get there, but at least Santa can do his shopping for Christmas now, and the kids won't miss out on their Saturday morning "Dino Run" game. Life is good.
Tomorrow, Bea and I head for the coast, on our tri-yearly (is that right? No, more like quarterly, only maybe not that often. Are you with me?) trek to Newport to see Doc and get assorted cats their shots, meds, what have you. It's an all day thing, but we save a LOT of money on the vet bills, and the care is superior. So suck on that Academy East Animal Hospital - the people who thought it might be good idea to check a cat for FeLv when he was presented with obvious poisoning symptoms. Because god forbid they would get their "piddies" dirty looking into the scary cat's mouth. You would think with a Vet School right up the road in Raleigh, at NCSU, you could get good care around here, but nope, nopety, nope. All they want to do is run a million expensive tests, and then waffle over the diagnosis, presumably so they can run some more tests. Bastards. I can guarantee, that even if one of my cats has some surprise issue tomorrow, it will still cost me less, for both cats, than if I had take just one of them to a local vet. And it's a road trip with Bea, with a lovely lunch in either Beaufort (a very cute town), or at the Sanitary Restaurant, a horrid name for a place everyone eats at; David Sedaris talks about going there in his book, "Dress Your Family In Corduroy And Denim" - I'm sure you can imagine the fun he had with a name like that!
So how the hell are you guys? I'm terribly out of the loop, though HALLELUJAH!!!!! the kitchen is finally painted, and the big party is past me, so now all I have to freak out about is getting my Christmas shopping done - piece of cake, comparatively speaking!
So, Soap Opera Update: the big birthday party went off beautifully; the birthday girl had a fabulous time being fussed over and sung to by (possibly) the loudest gang of miscreants assembled. I did NOT go gently into that liquid state I was dreaming of; there was too much to do, and I wanted it all to go smoothly. So no drunk hostess, which is probably for the best - less calories to work off at the gym, right?
Monday night I attempted to upgrade my browser to Windows Explorer 8, which apparently is TOTALLY incompatible with my aging, almost 5 year-old computer (and doesn't that piss you off, that expensive shit like a computer is obsolete in less than 5 years? Can you see my middle finger raised aloft, Mr. Gates? What, is it hard to see for the forest of middle fingers?). After installing the IE8, my computer promptly did it's finest James Brown Breaking Down imitation: ("I can't do no more!") there was no internets to be had, and all her inner workings were Gorilla Glue gunked-up. Neat, huh? I dragged my moronic behunkus off to bed at 1 AM, only to rise at 7:30 to escort the herd to school (well, ok, part of the herd - one calf leaves at 7:00 now - the steer sees him off. Not sure how or why I'm calling my family cows - I could be a little punchy yet.), and get back to the business of trying to fix my mess.
After 3 fruitless hours on the phone with my internet provider, Hewlett Packard, and Microsoft (where the guy hung up on me), and three System Restores which didn't restore much, I knew it was time to wipe the slate clean (oh Christ, another metaphor!), and send the computer back in a time warp to it's beginning. Also known as System Recovery, and it means a lot of re-installing headaches, because after 5 years, where have all those Registration numbers and passwords, etc. gotten to? Luckily (in this case), I'm a bit of a packrat, albeit an organized one, and the whole caboodle was tucked in a bag that I'd stuck in the desk, so not too bad of a headache, but the bundled BS that came back up on the System Recovery made up for that!
Long story short, I spent all day yesterday getting the Portal of Internet Goodness back up and looking reasonably normal. It only took 12 hours of un-installing, re-installing, re-booting, etc. to get there, but at least Santa can do his shopping for Christmas now, and the kids won't miss out on their Saturday morning "Dino Run" game. Life is good.
Tomorrow, Bea and I head for the coast, on our tri-yearly (is that right? No, more like quarterly, only maybe not that often. Are you with me?) trek to Newport to see Doc and get assorted cats their shots, meds, what have you. It's an all day thing, but we save a LOT of money on the vet bills, and the care is superior. So suck on that Academy East Animal Hospital - the people who thought it might be good idea to check a cat for FeLv when he was presented with obvious poisoning symptoms. Because god forbid they would get their "piddies" dirty looking into the scary cat's mouth. You would think with a Vet School right up the road in Raleigh, at NCSU, you could get good care around here, but nope, nopety, nope. All they want to do is run a million expensive tests, and then waffle over the diagnosis, presumably so they can run some more tests. Bastards. I can guarantee, that even if one of my cats has some surprise issue tomorrow, it will still cost me less, for both cats, than if I had take just one of them to a local vet. And it's a road trip with Bea, with a lovely lunch in either Beaufort (a very cute town), or at the Sanitary Restaurant, a horrid name for a place everyone eats at; David Sedaris talks about going there in his book, "Dress Your Family In Corduroy And Denim" - I'm sure you can imagine the fun he had with a name like that!
So how the hell are you guys? I'm terribly out of the loop, though HALLELUJAH!!!!! the kitchen is finally painted, and the big party is past me, so now all I have to freak out about is getting my Christmas shopping done - piece of cake, comparatively speaking!
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Procrastination - It's not just for breakfast anymore
Two weeks until the big party at my house - the one for my mom's 70th birthday. Oh hell yes, it's total mayhem, so what else is new? But at least no one has the swine flu (currently) (knock on wood). also, nothing like having a two week deadline to get that damn kitchen painted! It's actually kind of peaceful painting - it's something I can control, unlike all the douchebags (did I say that outloud?) who have yet to RSVP my invitation. They aren't my friends, but apparently they aren't my mother's friends either - grrr, assholes do vex me! Kind of hard to know how much seafood to order when you still have 20 invitations outstanding. Can I just yell "ASSHOLES" once? Thanks, I feel better now.
Well, okay, maybe not.
I had a hormonal meltdown last week - didn't hurt that the husband was an ass on our anniversary weekend - he has that kind of timing - but I went mental. It was kind of scary, even to me. I was fingering sharp blades and thinking dark, dark thoughts, which is what not sleeping for three weeks will get you, my lads.
I talked to my sister and she thought I might need to get on board with some progesterone and hydroxy-triptifan (it makes serotonin, which makes you sleepy), since it sounded like I was knee-deep in the glamourous world of peri-menopause. Because it's such affirming thing to be a woman, as it is, right? She's probably right, and a little research confirmed it, so now I'm smearing progesterone cream on myself eery night and popping hydroxy-triptifan capsules before bedtime, and guess what? I still can't sleep at night. I think I might be hard-wired to be a vampire. I think I might also be stressing over getting this party off the ground - it's how I roll - I haven't hit the Jimmy Crack Corn portion of the program yet, but I'm sure I will soon.
Oh crap, and it's Halloween this Saturday. I love Halloween, but I just don't have time for it this year. I told Chanda that I wished we could just hide out at her house, watch movies and eat all the candy we're supposed to give out. She was jiggy with that, but I don't think the guys will be!
Ah well, I guess it's back to work now - I can only procrastinate for so long, right?
Well, okay, maybe not.
I had a hormonal meltdown last week - didn't hurt that the husband was an ass on our anniversary weekend - he has that kind of timing - but I went mental. It was kind of scary, even to me. I was fingering sharp blades and thinking dark, dark thoughts, which is what not sleeping for three weeks will get you, my lads.
I talked to my sister and she thought I might need to get on board with some progesterone and hydroxy-triptifan (it makes serotonin, which makes you sleepy), since it sounded like I was knee-deep in the glamourous world of peri-menopause. Because it's such affirming thing to be a woman, as it is, right? She's probably right, and a little research confirmed it, so now I'm smearing progesterone cream on myself eery night and popping hydroxy-triptifan capsules before bedtime, and guess what? I still can't sleep at night. I think I might be hard-wired to be a vampire. I think I might also be stressing over getting this party off the ground - it's how I roll - I haven't hit the Jimmy Crack Corn portion of the program yet, but I'm sure I will soon.
Oh crap, and it's Halloween this Saturday. I love Halloween, but I just don't have time for it this year. I told Chanda that I wished we could just hide out at her house, watch movies and eat all the candy we're supposed to give out. She was jiggy with that, but I don't think the guys will be!
Ah well, I guess it's back to work now - I can only procrastinate for so long, right?
Thursday, October 8, 2009
My Lips Are Sealed, Dammit
The problem with blogs is that they're open to the world, so I can't lean over and whisper the latest dirt to you, dear reader, because the dirt-ee might be tuning in.
Dammit.
Because there is so much shite going on all around me right now, and I would love to spill, but I might just get my somewhat diminished and toned, but still bulbous ass into trouble. So I can't. I have to just sit here, staring at the screen, going, "Ah damn! Nope, can't write about that! Might be incriminating evidence in a court of law. Nope, it'll be my luck that she'll pop in here, so I can't dish about "Miss C", either."
I can tell you that planning and executing my mother's 70th birthday blowout will probably mean I won't be seeing my extended family again until the 11th hour of the Christmas holidays, because I'm going to need to take a leave of absence once it's over. (So probably no Solstice party kids, sorry, but it's on a damn Monday anyway - who would even come?) I haven't received a single RSVP for said party yet, which means (maybe) it'll be a small party (I hope), but OMG, if you'ld seen the guest list, either way, it's going to be a clash of cultures. I'm thinking maybe I should hire a band, to cover the uncomfortable silences and lack of mingling. What was I thinking? If I get the flu will I still have to be hostess? (Answers: Who the hell knows, and yep, most likely.)
Oh, and ask me if I've done SHIT to get the kitchen finished.
Funny you should ask: um, nope. Nada, el zippo. And guess what? Jimmy Crack Corn, ya'll!
I'm just swimming in the apathy right now, and dang it, it's like bathwater - I really don't care if I prune up in here.
So if you really want to know the dirt, you'll have to send your email, and I'll send you the unpublished story of who might be doing jail time, and what "Miss C's" latest caper is, because OMFG kids, who needs cable, around here anyway?
***Yet Another OMFG Update***
-one I CAN post-
The Hub man has been sick with a fever that doesn't want to fully respond to Tylenol or Motrin. Other than the fever, there hasn't been a lot of other symptoms, especially respiratory-based symptoms, just really tired and feverish. He went to the doctor today, and guess the hell what? Yes, the most obvious answer here is that he has the H1N1 virus, aka the Swine Flu. Does that mean we have to quarantine the whole house now, or just him? Does this also mean that he can't bogart the TV remote for the duration? Funny, thing, this kind of cheers me up!
Dammit.
Because there is so much shite going on all around me right now, and I would love to spill, but I might just get my somewhat diminished and toned, but still bulbous ass into trouble. So I can't. I have to just sit here, staring at the screen, going, "Ah damn! Nope, can't write about that! Might be incriminating evidence in a court of law. Nope, it'll be my luck that she'll pop in here, so I can't dish about "Miss C", either."
I can tell you that planning and executing my mother's 70th birthday blowout will probably mean I won't be seeing my extended family again until the 11th hour of the Christmas holidays, because I'm going to need to take a leave of absence once it's over. (So probably no Solstice party kids, sorry, but it's on a damn Monday anyway - who would even come?) I haven't received a single RSVP for said party yet, which means (maybe) it'll be a small party (I hope), but OMG, if you'ld seen the guest list, either way, it's going to be a clash of cultures. I'm thinking maybe I should hire a band, to cover the uncomfortable silences and lack of mingling. What was I thinking? If I get the flu will I still have to be hostess? (Answers: Who the hell knows, and yep, most likely.)
Oh, and ask me if I've done SHIT to get the kitchen finished.
Funny you should ask: um, nope. Nada, el zippo. And guess what? Jimmy Crack Corn, ya'll!
I'm just swimming in the apathy right now, and dang it, it's like bathwater - I really don't care if I prune up in here.
So if you really want to know the dirt, you'll have to send your email, and I'll send you the unpublished story of who might be doing jail time, and what "Miss C's" latest caper is, because OMFG kids, who needs cable, around here anyway?
***Yet Another OMFG Update***
-one I CAN post-
The Hub man has been sick with a fever that doesn't want to fully respond to Tylenol or Motrin. Other than the fever, there hasn't been a lot of other symptoms, especially respiratory-based symptoms, just really tired and feverish. He went to the doctor today, and guess the hell what? Yes, the most obvious answer here is that he has the H1N1 virus, aka the Swine Flu. Does that mean we have to quarantine the whole house now, or just him? Does this also mean that he can't bogart the TV remote for the duration? Funny, thing, this kind of cheers me up!
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