Its been a little over four months since I began this blog, in the hopes it would spark some creativity and help me hone my writing. I have to say, that for the most part, it has been more stifling to my creativity than nurturing. I find myself not saying what I want to say, because I might not get the all-important traffic, and that bothers me. I also find it keeps me from getting to the easel as often, and that is a really bad thing, in my opinion, as I don't need any extra reasons to procrastinate.
I look around the blogosphere and see a vast range of quality in the blogs I have come across. It isn't for me to criticize what makes someone else happy or fufilled, but I wonder sometimes at the wisdom of offering up one's life to such an inconsistent yardstick for measurement. According to the blog-ruler, I don't measure up at all, which actually is somewhat comforting, but the question remains: To blog or not to blog. To get caught up in the artificial popularity contest that appears to be the impetus to having a sucessful blog, or to simply step away from it and get back to real life.
I've read blog after blog wherein the writers confess to us that they cannot control their children, cannot relate to their husband, cannot feel in synch with their life, and it occurs to me that there is a giant elephant in the blogosphere no one wants to address, and that is the addictive potential of computers and the internet. Of course no one in blogland is going to go unplugged, and their kids are going to be plugged in as well (I believe that's called enablement), and if anyone dares to raise the questions of "how soon should a child be plugged in", or "how much is too much" they're going to receive a raft of ugly verbage. It does seem to me that a disproportionate number of bloggers have kids with ADHD or autistic-related issues, and rarely do I read about these parents considering the benefit of making lifestyle changes, like unplugging those kids from TV and computers, or giving up junk food, or setting a bedtime and sticking with it; all of which could reap just as much benefit as slapping them on a drug, just so Mom can get back to her virtual world.
Ugly words? Only if you're in denial. What is ugly about wanting parents to grow up and take on the job they said they wanted? Parenting is a full-time job, so if you're only doing it part-time, who's picking up the slack for you? If what you're doing isn't working, shouldn't you WANT to try something new? Does anyone really appreciate a martyr who isn't ever pro-active about making change/making things happen?
These are some of the questions that come to my mind, as I surf the blogosphere, and ask myself, "why am I here?" If I am here to speak my mind, and not pander to some sorority for acceptance, then I have to say what I think; not what I think you might want to hear.